What is compassion, a brief definition. What is compassion - the benefits of showing it in everyday life. The problem of showing compassion

The feeling of compassion, empathy or empathy is an internal state. It's because of other people's problems. Of course, empathy is one of the best human qualities. If you are able to have compassion for others, then you understand other people's feelings. This helps build strong relationships. It is important for every person to realize that they are supported.

What is compassion and empathy

But it is important to understand what constitutes compassion and empathy. These feelings make a person better. Often these concepts are used in the form of synonymous words; it is believed that these are the same emotions.

If you delve into these words, sympathy is the shared experience of certain emotions, and compassion is shared suffering due to something. Both terms mean that a person goes through joy and sorrow and misfortune with another person. Both feelings are caused by a situation where pity and support are required. But these are things that need to be demonstrated if they are truly needed.

Compassion and empathy are similar emotions, but the main difference lies in their expression.

You can often hear that in modern world Only believers or poor people are capable of compassion and sympathy, and rich people do not think about anyone if it does not contribute to their well-being. It is believed that today, for every truly sympathetic person, there are 1000 who envy others. The reason for this opinion is the character of the individual himself. Indifferent people cannot experience such feelings.

In everyday life, we show such emotions taking into account specific situations. For example, one will give to the person asking, and the other will pass by. People show the greatest compassion towards their elderly parents, sick children, and friends.

Often, when showing compassion, we can offend a person who does not need pity. Moreover, true compassion causes harm. If a doctor sympathizes with a patient and worries too much, he himself becomes ill. Therefore, he only needs to sympathize, but not sympathize.

Showing empathy means listening to your interlocutor and understanding his emotions. To do this, you will have to pass them through yourself. Sincerely sympathetic people get upset and worry in exactly the same way as the one who needs this sympathy. This instills faith in a person and helps him forget his worries. Empathy makes people kind.

Why does a person need compassion?

But why do we need compassion and empathy? If you are an emotional person, and this feeling manifests itself excessively, then you have noticed that it is difficult for you to feel the suffering of others. Alien negative energy wraps itself around you, you stop feeling the joy of life. Compassion has a depressing effect and takes away strength.

You should not become overly immersed in the suffering of other people. It is important to be able to stop and not harm yourself with other people’s misfortunes.

In addition, if you constantly sympathize with one person, it harms both him and you. Constant compassion causes you to inadvertently prevent the suffering person from taking responsibility for his own actions. Due to constant sympathy, the person feels his weakness and the need for outside help. Such people are not able to live their own independent lives; they always need outside support.

Therefore, it is important not only to be able to empathize, but also to feel the boundary when you need to protect yourself from other people’s emotions. Measurement is needed in everything.

How to sympathize with someone

In order not to harm yourself, you need to know how to properly sympathize with a person:

  • you need to understand who causes such a feeling – your loved ones or everyone around you? From whom does it come? When you feel that you are taking other people's experiences too closely,... Don't get caught up in other people's problems. Support the person, convince him that he is not alone. But he needs to find a solution to the situation himself;
  • and return to the original state when you realize that you are plunging into other people's problems. Stop the conversation until you feel that you are able to understand the situation normally. Remember that all your feelings affect the body. For this reason, for the normal state of body and soul, it is important to experience to the maximum;

  • be able to move from unconscious sympathy to conscious action in a timely manner. Whenever you try to get rid of compassion for others, you will feel guilty. But you should not consider yourself a person devoid of compassion. To support, you don’t have to let negative energy pass through you. Listen, but don't worry too much. Learn to protect yourself from negativity and excessive sympathy.

Of course it's important to stay kind person. We all have a responsibility to help our friends and loved ones. But it is possible to do this without harming yourself. It is important to maintain the balance of your own body in order to feel personal happiness.

Cultivating empathy and compassion in children

It is worth noting that from early childhood, serious attention must be paid to instilling compassion and empathy in children. A child who is not able to show such emotions grows up, and sometimes becomes a true disaster for his parents and himself.

Only those children whose parents set a similar example by their behavior have the ability to compassion and sympathize with others. In order for a child to care and empathize with others when they have problems, it is necessary to protect him from punishment from an early age.

You can cultivate such qualities in children only by your own example. It is important for parents to show their child how to behave.

If mom and dad show mutual politeness, are also polite to other people, and show care, then the baby will get used to behaving similarly. Researchers have found that men are more capable of experiencing empathy and compassion in families. But we are accustomed to thinking that they are stronger, and therefore show less feelings. When a woman feels bad, a man helps, not just by sympathizing, but by showing compassion and care. He is ready to help his beloved around the clock.

As for women, they are able to experience sympathy for a short period of time. This is because when a man is unwell, a woman, seeing his emotions, first feels compassion. But then, noticing how he is trying to seem strong, the woman’s compassion disappears.

Even if men express complaints about life, they are not ready for the compassion of others. When showing sympathy for men, there is a chance to touch their pride, because all representatives of the stronger sex are afraid of appearing weak.

What to guide in life

In some situations, it is difficult to understand what to guide in life - the mind or the heart. There is no single correct answer. Each situation requires a special approach. Both the heart and the mind are capable of making mistakes.

It is worth conducting a logical analysis of the situation, making important decisions, taking into account the opinion of reason and knowledge. We all use experience and knowledge in practice every day, we use reason. Most decisions come to be made using the dictates of reason, because some things in life are simply inappropriate. You don’t walk across the road as you please without following the rules. This will cause a disaster sooner or later. By applying knowledge, we make sure it is safe, and only then decide what to do.

But when it comes to one’s own emotions and desires, then the mind becomes an interfering element. In matters of the heart, you often have to live with your heart, turning off logic. Often a person is unable to do something because he is afraid of the consequences. But in such a situation, it is better to trust the call of the heart rather than the mind, so as not to regret in the future.

Fears and inability to believe in yourself are created by the mind; they are based on accumulated experience. If you previously had to experience such fear, then when making a decision today, you will feel fear and anxiety. This will cause indecision. For this reason, it is important to set goals, listen to your heart and act on its prompts.

Greetings, dear readers and guests of my blog! Today I want to talk to you about such an important human quality as compassion, his examples and distinctive features. This is one of the highest qualities of a person, only on one condition: that it is true and not false. It is sometimes confused with worldly charity, or pity; I will tell you how they differ a little later. Therefore, read the article to the end.

In explanatory dictionaries you can find a definition that this is pity for someone else’s grief, shared suffering. This topic, of course, can be discussed for a long time, but I believe that this definition fundamentally wrong.

Compassion is a person's ability to feel the emotions and experiences of other people. It is a light that comes from one person and softens or even heals the pain of another.

Compassion has its own components, without which it cannot be complete. These are kindness, mercy, love, respect and patience.

Let's look at each component in more detail.

Mercy

This two-root word literally means “sweet heart.” What does mercy mean? First of all, selfless help. For example, helping an elderly person carry bags, feeding a hungry person street dog, just listen to someone. Secondly, mercy is the ability to forgive.

Kindness

This is a caring attitude towards people and the world as a whole. Kindness is not always obvious; sometimes it is not easy to see.

Let me give you two parents as an example. The father generously feeds his little son with candy, cakes and other sweets that he asks for. But his mother, on the contrary, does not allow him to indulge in sweets. Of course, in the child’s opinion, dad is kinder in this situation. But is this really so? Sometimes what is mistaken for kindness is simply an inability to refuse, simple conformity. Of course, in this case, real kindness and care are shown by the mother, although it is hidden behind external severity.

Love

A lot has been said and written about love, because it is such a broad and comprehensive concept that one can talk about endlessly. But now we will look at love as a component of compassion.

Of course, it is much easier to empathize with your loved ones, because the emotions of kindred spirits resonate at the same frequency. What to do with strangers or how to show compassion to the enemy? In order to learn to love and feel everything the world around us and its inhabitants, it is necessary to improve and develop their spiritual qualities.

Respect

The object of compassion must be treated with respect. Even if it is a small earthworm, it is the same creature of nature needed by this world. Without proper respect and understanding, compassion turns into pity and humiliates the one to whom this feeling is manifested.

Patience

When you do something, it happens that they are not appreciated. Patience in this case will be an indicator of sincerity.

Showing compassion and empathy

Let's look at some examples of how compassion manifests itself. Let's start with the most common one.

Worldly charity

Charity is now in fashion among famous, rich people. I have nothing against this fashion, quite the contrary, perhaps it is the best of all existing ones and I support it. Only such good deeds done for selfish reasons (the pursuit of fashion trends, the desire to look better in the eyes of others, fame, recognition), cannot be called sincere compassion. It will not be able to cleanse the soul and fill it with light.

Very rare individuals do not flaunt their good deeds. If a person is driven by such selfish motives, then let’s say if they were not justified, if he were not glorified properly, then it is unclear whether he would have committed such a charitable act.

True Compassion

True compassion comes from the depths of the heart, it inspires a person to do good deeds without demanding anything in return.

Sh.B.3.3.21

tikshavah karunikah

suhrdah sarva-dehinam

ajata-shatravah santah

sadhavah sadhu-bhushanah

The sadhu is patient and merciful and is the friend of all living beings. He has no enemies, is peaceful, strictly follows the injunctions of the sastras and is endowed with all virtues.

A sadhu is a deeply spiritual person who has dedicated his life to God and strives to give knowledge to others. And all the qualities of compassion, according to this verse, are fully manifested in him.

He is patient and merciful. He develops friendship for all living beings - this means that he treats people and animals equally mercifully. Each living creature has the right to live in this world. Such a person does not harbor enmity towards anyone, even if someone is hostile towards her. While performing good deeds, the sadhu is patient, since often people do not appreciate his actions. The true task of such a person is to save the souls of others, and not just the body. As one of the proverbs says: “What is the point of saving the clothes of a drowning man if you need to save him himself.”

Therefore, true compassion can only be fully experienced by highly spiritual individuals who are willing to sacrifice everything in order to give true knowledge and happiness to others. To bring other people closer to God, to give them the opportunity for spiritual progress.

It happens that a person wants to show his compassion, but as soon as his comfort zone is touched, all good intentions disappear. The conclusion in such a situation is obvious.

Video - a story from ancient Vedic scriptures about compassion

Compassion for children and animals

Many people find it much easier to feel compassion for children and animals because their souls are pure and innocent. Unfortunately, it is impossible to help all the sick and homeless, but still we can do a lot.

For example, you can refuse to eat meat, in this way you will show mercy and save several innocent animals. One social organization I calculated approximately how much meat a person eats in his life: more than 1000 chickens, a dozen pigs and cows. I started 12 years ago, thereby saving more than a hundred animals.

Compassion for other people

Many people have problems with compassion and empathy for their own kind. Projection comes to the fore, and unpleasant thoughts and arguments enter the head: “Why should I help someone, I have enough problems myself,” etc.

A fair summary of this story is that the well-fed do not understand the hungry.

How to develop and shape compassion

To begin with, I will try to explain why you need to develop compassion in yourself.

Compassion makes our heart wider, but selfishness, on the contrary, narrows it.

When we have a “big” heart, then we have good relationship those around us, we feel healthy and complete. And gradually our consciousness approaches God

As a result of selfishness, the heart narrows, illnesses and misfortunes come.

Our modern civilization ties a knot in the heart, if you look at everyone, they are all tortured and unhappy.

People without this quality exhibit callousness and cruelty. Sincere feelings cannot enter such a soul - neither joy nor love. When we empathize with others, our soul is purified and becomes more receptive to peace and spiritual knowledge.

As I already said, it’s easier to sympathize with someone else’s grief when you’ve experienced a similar unpleasant event in your own skin.

The main key to developing compassion lies in spiritual self-improvement.

One of the barriers to compassion is self-centeredness. People are too fixated on their “I” and thoughts about their own good. Try to practice empathy at least once a day. Look at some person and ask yourself the question “What would I feel in his place?” It is best to do this during a conflict situation, thereby you will complete 3 missions at once:

  1. take your mind off your own negative feelings;
  2. practice empathy;
  3. mitigate the conflict.

The difference between pity and compassion

Now I will tell you the difference between pity and true compassion. There is a significant difference between these concepts. Pity is a destructive and destructive feeling, and compassion is bright and creative. Pity is inaction, while compassion provides help. Pity comes from the mind, and compassion from the heart.

Let's analyze these statements using an example. Imagine a seriously ill person. Relatives are sitting next to him, crying and feeling sorry for him. They already doom the patient and give him an internal message that he will not be able to cope with difficulties. Thus, they drive a person into an even greater abyss of misfortune, and he gives up.

Compassion carries creative energy and good spirits. A person who truly demonstrates this quality will not remain idle; he will provide all possible assistance and look for optimal ways out of the situation. Such people emanate vibrations filled with light and love, which in themselves have a beneficial effect on those around them and give them the strength to overcome difficulties.

As often happens, our neighbor needs our support and sympathy. The ability to empathize with another person and feel sorry for him is usually called compassion.

Compassion is a feeling that many of us have when we see someone else in pain or bad. Feeling compassion, we try to console someone who is in trouble, to somehow help him, if it is in our power.

I think compassion is directly related to empathy. An empathic person can feel the emotions of other people well, and therefore he always notices the state of his interlocutor. Everyone's ability to empathize is expressed differently, so some may immediately respond to someone else's grief, while others may seem cold and insensitive.

It seems to me that I belong to the first category of people, since I always understand when someone else is feeling bad. I can feel pity and compassion not only from acquaintances or friends, but also from animals in trouble. Therefore, I often feed hungry dogs on the street, remove kittens from trees, and every year in winter I hang a bird feeder on the balcony.

If I notice something is bad to a stranger, then I also try to somehow cheer him up, sometimes I can even come up and say that everything will be fine. Having learned about other people's troubles from the news on TV, I can sometimes get very upset and start to worry, because I sincerely sympathize with these people.

I think we all need empathy. In a difficult moment, you always really want to bury yourself in someone’s strong shoulder, relax and give free rein to your tears. I would like to be pitied, reassured and encouraged. This desire is absolutely natural, and there is nothing reprehensible in it, because we are all human, and we all need warmth and care.

Hello, dear readers of the blog site. We know firsthand about suffering—the experience of our own misfortune. We are familiar with our inner world and what happens in it is often clear.

I'm in pain - I'm crying, sad - I'm sad. However, not all people can understand what it feels like for another in such a situation - what compassion is. It’s one thing to feel positive when you see someone doing well.

But adopting someone else’s is not so easy, and you don’t always want to. Why you need to be able to sympathize, what it gives you is the topic of today’s article.

Compassion is...

The word "compassion" can be broken down into two parts:

  1. co – a particle meaning joining to something. In this case, to suffering;
  2. suffering is the experience of negative emotions.

Thus, compassion means joining others’ painful feelings, the ability to step into the shoes of another and live what he is experiencing at a given moment in time.

In psychology, this personal quality is called empathy: knows how to be sincerely happy, sad, surprised, angry, happy, etc. together with the other, subtly capturing the internal mood of the interlocutor.

Compassion is also called empathy, sympathy, which means the willingness of an individual to take on part of the pain experienced by a neighbor so that the latter feels better.

Remember a situation in which you felt bad on a mental level. If someone nearby says something like “Calm down, pull yourself together, don’t get upset,” then such consolation does not alleviate the negative state.

At this moment, it seems that the other person devalues ​​your feelings, does not understand them, so you want to break off contact with him. The feeling that you are left alone with your grief only intensifies the experience.

What if close person will say: “I know how bad you feel, I feel you, I am going through the same thing as you, I will be with you while you feel bad,” then the picture changes. The sufferer feels strong support, a shoulder, leaning on which he can give vent to his experiences and not lose heart. And most importantly, he does not feel lonely.

The ability to compassion is not innate: it is laid down from birth in the process of upbringing.

If parents have emotional intelligence - they know how to recognize their feelings, talk about them and express them in an environmentally friendly way, then the child will learn the same. Emotionally cold adults who live like robots will grow up to be people who cannot hear themselves or others.

This leads to the fact that the individual feels unhappy, since he does not distinguish between his needs and does not satisfy them. For the same reason, it is broken: he does not have the opportunity to take what he wants and reciprocate with others.

Compassion in everyday life

This quality is not isolated from others: it goes hand in hand with other character traits:


Sometimes compassion is confused with love, using these concepts as synonyms. In fact, they are based on different mechanisms.

Which comes from personal motives, lives against everything, and sometimes to the detriment of itself and its interests. Inside compassion is need to help others, save, help out.

How is compassion shown? V everyday life:

  1. and people participating in charity are a vivid example of those in whom the feeling of compassion is leading. They help the poor, refugees, orphans and others in need simply because their heart tells them to;
  2. in interpersonal relationships - this is the ability to help, support in difficult times, and share the negative emotions of your neighbor;
  3. many religious movements promote compassion.
    1. In Christianity, this is a covenant calling to treat others the same way you want to be treated.
    2. In Buddhism, compassion is the desire to rid the entire world of suffering.
    3. In Hinduism, the only path to enlightenment is through compassion: only through it is a person capable of truly high, pure deeds.

The bad side

Compassion is a feeling, and therefore always subjective. Often, being in the role of a sufferer, it seems to us that those who empathize with us do not give us at all what we would like. For example:

  1. the alcoholic wants another portion of alcohol and asks loved ones for money. The latter, instead of fulfilling his request, take the sufferer to a drug treatment center. From the point of view of the patient, he was betrayed, not realizing that in fact he was being saved from certain death;
  2. parents depriving their over-aged son monthly allowance, they do this not because they want to do him harm, but to awaken in him personal responsibility and the desire to live independently.

True Compassion comes from a highly developed spirituality, inner strength a person who is sometimes able to act contrary to what is asked of him.

Therefore, being able to empathize is not so easy. This is not about doing something nice for someone else, receiving a bunch of thanks and patting yourself on the head, saying, what a great guy I am. There is no place for personal gain and self-interest in any of its manifestations.

What gives a person compassion?

Recently, the moral and ethical aspects of existence, unfortunately, have become less and less valuable.

Kindness, the ability to forgive, and altruism are often mistaken for weakness, softness and simplicity. People are afraid to be open, sensitive, to show their insides for fear of being used or ridiculed, shamed.

However, these are all misconceptions that occur in the world due to political and economic instability.

What gives a person quality such as compassion:


Compassion does not mean giving away your last pants, food, money, housing, loved one, etc. to those in need. This is a manifestation of sincere sympathy, moral support and feasible, material assistance, providing which you will not suffer either physically or mentally.

Good luck to you! See you soon on the pages of the blog site

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All people need compassion to one degree or another. There are many situations in life that are difficult to cope with on your own, and a person’s true need is the desire to share his emotional state with someone else. But, unfortunately, not everyone knows what compassion is. Some do not experience it at all, others simply do not know how to manifest it.

What Compassion Really Is: 5 Definitions That Will Make Your World Never the Same

Compassion, psychologists say, can be expressed in five definitions:

  • compassion is an expression of true love and understanding for one's neighbor;
  • compassion is the ability to feel and alleviate a person’s suffering;
  • compassion is respect for the experiences of others without diminishing their importance;
  • compassion is action for the benefit of another, sometimes even to the detriment of oneself;
  • compassion is the quality of a person who is capable of selfless help.

Did you look inside yourself and sigh with relief: “Well, I’m okay with this!”? Don’t rush to rejoice; perhaps you feel pity for people rather than compassion.

What is compassion and how does it differ from pity: you need to know this!

Sometimes people confuse compassion with pity. But if you delve into the meaning of these words, you will realize that they are completely opposite.

Imagine a seriously ill person and his relatives grieving around him. How do you think they feel about this? That's right, a pity! With their moaning and lamentations, they only aggravate the patient’s condition. The negativity they emit does not help in any way, but on the contrary, it makes everyone around them depressed.

Another thing is compassion! Its essence is to alleviate the plight of the patient. A sincerely compassionate person understands that his mission is to distract the patient, please him, and help him concentrate on something pleasant. Interestingly, such an attitude can often work miracles and heal illnesses.

Simply put, pity comes from the mind, and compassion comes from the soul. Pity destroys, but compassion heals. Pity is inaction, compassion is help. And only a truly generous person is capable of sincere expression of compassion.

5 Characteristics of a Compassionate Person

To truly feel what compassion is, you must have such high qualities as:

    Mercy.

    A compassionate person always tries to be positive and friendly to everyone around him. The word “mercy” uses a combination of two words “sweet” and “heart”, and this characterizes this quality better than anything else.

    Shows of kindness come in many forms, but are not always obvious. Kindness is an activity aimed at the benefit of another. Let's give a simple example. The child eats a lot of sweets. Moreover, one of the parents allows this, but the other does not. At the same time, it is not the first who shows kindness, as it might seem, but the second, who sincerely cares about the health of his child.

    Therefore, kindness is not the inability to refuse, but sincere concern.

    Respect.

    Without respect, compassion is impossible. If a person does not respect others, he can only feel pity, while showing his superiority and condescension.

    By respecting the pain and suffering of our neighbor, we are only able to feel them ourselves and thereby alleviate them.

    Patience.

    Our kindness is not always appreciated and accepted. Sometimes it is easier for people to accept negativity and believe the worst. But by having patience, we only prove the selflessness of our help, and the belief that our actions will still be for the good.

    Oh, how much has been sung and written about this wonderful feeling! This concept is very multifaceted, and everyone puts their own meaning into it.

    As for compassion, there is no talk of it without love. towards our neighbor guides all the good deeds that we do. True love does not see barriers, so it is able to overcome what the mind cannot.

3 Common Expressions of Compassion

Compassion can manifest itself in different ways. For example, to one’s own kind, that is, to people, to animals, or to the world as a whole. Each type has its own characteristics.

1. Secular charity: compassion or a cheap farce?

Recently, it has become very fashionable for celebrities to participate in charity. In truth, of all the popular trends, this fashion at least brings real benefits. Famous personalities, considering themselves socially responsible, should set a worthy example to their fans and encourage them to also help those in need.

It’s sad to realize, but not for everyone this kind of compassion is sincere and comes from the heart. Many participate in such events largely to gain love and popularity among others, making sure to flaunt every good deed they have done. I wonder how many of them would continue their charitable activities if no one knew about it?

2. Compassion for children and animals: do not offend the weak!

Among all the manifestations of compassion, it is most easily “given” to children and animals.

The best thing we can do for children is to give them love, lots of love. In this way, a strong foundation is laid for the full development of the little personality. Providing them with knowledge that is important for life is another task that is important for parents to set themselves.

When it comes to animals, an obvious example of compassion is vegetarianism. By giving up food of animal origin, you will save hundreds of living beings. The same applies to giving up natural fur products. The modern fashion industry offers a bunch of alternatives to this kind of clothing.

3. Compassion for your “neighbor”: everything is much more complicated than you thought

Many people have difficulty expressing compassion for others. Here thoughts appear like “Why should I help? Nobody helps me!”, “I have my own problems”, “Go and work!”.

The conclusion from this story can be described by the well-known phrase - “A well-fed person will not understand a hungry person.” This means that people are more willing to help those whose difficulties are close to them, in whose shoes they have been, so to speak.

Compassion and empathy or the ability to feel emotions.

What is compassion and how not to confuse it with pity?

3 ways to learn what compassion is by your own example, or How to make your heart “not a stone”

A person who is capable of compassion has many advantages. First of all, having helped your neighbor, it is impossible not to feel your own importance and inner satisfaction. By doing a good deed, we move closer to the common good, making the world a better place. Knowing how to compassion, our heart becomes larger and filled with light, then it is easier for us to build relationships with others and live in general. But the most important thing is that sincere compassion is the best manifestation of love.

This feeling, unfortunately, is not familiar to everyone, but it can be cultivated in oneself.

To understand what compassion is:

    religion and spiritual literature.

    All religions of the world - from Christianity to Buddhism - talk about the need to help one's neighbor. This quality is integral to a highly spiritual person. By reading spiritual literature, you can better understand the meaning of compassion through specific examples;

    charity.

    As mentioned, charity has become very popular among the rich famous personalities. But ordinary person can also join it and make his own, albeit small, contribution. If thousands of people gave up just one cup of coffee and donated the money they saved, it could save someone's life. Think about it!

    A great way to learn to show compassion is to volunteer in care homes and hospitals. A piece of attention and love is so little and, at the same time, so much!

    self-improvement and interest in people.

    Selfishness leaves no room for understanding, respect and love for others. Being fixated on our problems makes us indifferent to each other.

    Try to develop and improve your personality, understand yourself and what is important to you in life. Once you understand yourself, you can be sincerely interested in others and strive to help them.

You can learn correct relationships with your neighbors all your life, but start showing your best qualities in small things you can today. Listening carefully to a friend's problems, giving up a seat on the bus to an elderly person, helping to carry a heavy package - all these are small manifestations of respect, kindness, mercy and compassion in general.

It is not in vain that experts in human souls say: once you have learned what compassion is, you will never again be indifferent to others, because again and again you will want to experience the ease, light and positivity that helping your neighbor gives.

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